


And Yet

by GlitchyPix



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Akiren cries, Angst, Angst with an Ambiguous Ending, Hurt/Comfort, It's a 2/2 fic babeyyyyyyyyyy, M/M, Persona 5: The Royal Spoilers, quite a bit actually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-14 14:14:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29047503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlitchyPix/pseuds/GlitchyPix
Summary: Akira felt his fists clench and his breath shook as he refused to look up. He could tell Akechi was about to retort back with something sharp and biting and poisonously mean, maybe in some kind of a vain attempt to get Akira to hate him but he didn't let him get the chance."I know! I know I can't let Maruki have his reality, of course I know that! I wasn't going to fold!"Where in Akira knows he can't accept Maruki's reality and has difficulty accepting that.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45





	And Yet

**Author's Note:**

> Happy 2/2 everybody, hope y'all enjoy my first Persona 5 fic.

Maruki had walked out and left them with an ultimatum. An ultimatum that Akira had known the answer to from the start. He couldn't choose to let Maruki's reality go fulfilled, of course he couldn't, he knew exactly why he couldn't and had gone through a whole palace based on that why.

And yet.

Akechi was staring him down from the counter as Akira felt his mouth dry out and nausea filled his stomach. He should've realised this so much sooner. Of course Akechi hadn't survived, how could he have survived, Futaba said there were no readings after the gunshots. Akechi had died in that engine room and Akira knew it or he should've known it at least. He should've realised it when he saw Wakaba Isshiki and Kunikazu Okumura alive and well, he should've.

And yet.

As he stood up and listened to Akechi tell him about how he would decide his own path and how he refused to be controlled, Akira thought about Yaldabaoth and how Akechi hadn't been around to scream at the false God for toying with his life. For controlling him and using him as a tool and a puppet in his game. About how Akechi hadn't been there to scream and shout and angrily attack that false God with them because he'd died at the hand of Shido's cognition. Because he'd essentially doomed himself to his fate to make sure the others would change Shido's heart. Akira thought about that and felt the sickness well up in his throat about how unfair this all was and how he wished he'd realised Akechi's existence wasn't real earlier, before this moment. Before he had to condemn someone he loved so dearly to his death.

"I refuse to accept a reality concocted by someone else, stuck under their control for the rest of my days," 

"But then you'll…" It slipped out before Akira could stop himself, unable to control the utter gloom he felt at the inevitable. He couldn't help it, he couldn't help but try and defy it even though he knew that he couldn't without severely fucking up and fucking over not only his friends but Akechi himself. He knew there wasn't another option in this, he had to fight Maruki and let Akechi die.

And yet.

"So what?" Akechi had practically spat, snapping his head towards Akira with a sharp glare that would've scared a normal person. "That's the path I chose. All you have to do is stick to your guns and challenge Maruki," He tilted his head down, unable to look at the other. Akira wished the vitriol that dripped from Akechi's tone made him feel more guilty for hesitating. He wished that Akechi's biting words had hurt more than the searing ache his death had left in his chest.

And yet.

"Or are you really so spineless that you'd fold over some bullshit, trivial threat on my life?"

"This isn't "trivial"!" 

Thus, the dam broke.

Akira felt his fists clench and his breath shook as he refused to look up. He could tell Akechi was about to retort back with something sharp and biting and poisonously mean, maybe in some kind of a vain attempt to get Akira to hate him but he didn't let him get the chance. "I know! I know I can't let Maruki have his reality, of course I know that! I wasn't going to fold!"

"If that's true then why are you stalling? You're not exactly wearing much of a poker face you know, your hesitation would've been obvious even if you hadn't argued with me," Akechi's composure was still calm despite Akira's shouting, that same contempt-filled tone still in play. He sounded hateful but he wasn't yelling and Akira didn't know if he wanted him to or not. "I don't want your pity, especially not now, not when it could compromise everything we worked towards. Not when it could trap me under that useless piece of shit's thumb for the rest of my life. If you're really set on fighting then cut the bullshit and-"

"Goro, please!" 

Akira heard his voice crack around the same time he noticed the tears streaming down his face which only registered when he looked up at Goro and realised his vision was hazy and wet. He felt himself choke something back and it was only after he did so that he realised he was holding back sobs. Sniffling, he wiped his eyes in some futile attempt to compose himself before taking a deep, shuddering breath.

"I won't accept Maruki's deal- I can't accept his reality. I can't do that to everyone else or to you," Akira eventually choked out. "It wouldn't be right of me to change my mind now, I know that,"

"If that's the case then why fight in the first place. If you know what you have to do then why waste my time and patience with this, you could've said that you'd fight him at the start and this conversation likely would've been a lot less…" Akira swears he hears the word 'painful' get caught on Goro's tongue before he shallows in down. "...belligerent,"

"Knowing what I have to do doesn't make that thing easy. You know what my wish was-" Akira found himself being cut off by an exasperated huff.

"Yes and, as I told you before, that pity isn't appreciated. I don't-" And, in turn, Goro found himself cut off directly by Akira's voice.

"It wasn't pity, not most of it anyway. Maybe I did feel sympathy towards your fate but that's not why you're back," Akira tried not to remember what happened after Goro's death. How he'd essentially jumped straight into stealing Shido's heart with no time in-between to mourn, how none of the other Phantom Thieves even really mentioned him again after, how none of them even thought to connect the dots between Akira's listless state after Shido's fight and Goro's death. Soon enough, Goro himself became seemingly forgotten by all but a few people and Akira had wanted to cry when he realised. He saved his tears for when he searched around for The Proof of Justice. Akira found himself with no other option but to bottle up his grief as he fought a god of control who had enslaved the minds of the populace and played some elaborate game of chess using him and Goro as the pieces. 

He should've been more suspicious when he saw Goro standing there in the crossroad, offering himself for arrest in Akira's stead. Then again, he probably should've done a lot of things differently. Goro hadn't made any sort of response, just staring at him expectantly and Akira let out a soft sigh, feeling his emotions welling up again. 

"I wish I'd told you this before but...I love you,"

Akira's voice came out soft, as if something would break if he dared let it raise. Goro's expression seemed to stay the same but there was something in his eyes, some sort of understanding. "I think I've loved you for a while and...I just- I missed you? I just..it felt lonely after you died and I don't really think I ever really moved on properly from it," He put his hands into his pockets, feeling around inside and gripping the glove that he'd been given what felt like ages ago.

"..." Goro's gaze flickered as he seemed to look for some kind of response. His mouth would part slightly only to close again a second later and Akira had to wonder what he was thinking of. The long gap of silence between them almost felt painful and Akira felt something bitter build up in his chest as he thought about how, in a normal situation, he probably would've been internally panicking that Goro didn't feel the same. He only would've preferred being in that situation as opposed to the unavoidable gloom that hung in the atmosphere around them.

He hadn't realised the tears had started welling back up until he felt an ungloved hand wipe them away. Goro's expression was still unreadable but it had softened and Akira felt the urge to both cry even harder and pull him into a hug, both of which he ended up doing as he wrapped his arms around Goro's waist and dropped his head to his shoulder. It took a few seconds before Goro responded, wrapping his own arms around him and rubbing his back. 

They stayed like that for a while, Akira's convulsive sobs eventually dying down enough for him to speak again. "Can- Do you mind maybe...maybe staying the night? Please?"

"Alright…"  
  
Part of Akira screamed at him to backpedal, to push Goro away and hope that the distance would suddenly give birth to apathy by tomorrow morning. Another part of his brain begged him to tell Goro he'd changed his mind and that they would accept Maruki's reality. Akira ignored them both as he led Goro up to the attic, readying himself for a long talk. He didn't know if this would accomplish anything, maybe it would bring him closure so he could move forward having been able to say goodbye properly or maybe spending Goro's last night talking would make his absence hurt all the more once he was gone. Either way, he found himself talking all the more readily as the night was drawn out more and more and Goro eventually suggested they get some rest before their fight with Maruki tomorrow. Akira stares out at the moon and the stars as he settles down before closing his eyes.

That night, he dreams of warmth and a departing train.


End file.
